Comfortable
by IlovemyDeanBean
Summary: He didn't even try to make me feel like I belonged.


Run  
Running all the time  
Running to the future  
With you right by my side  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
He sniffed, stuffing his hands farther into his pockets. Cigarettes.  
Each time he smelled the burning tobacco, he thought of one person  
now. One person, one thing, one woman that would make him stand in  
the snow, and close his eyes, letting snowflakes fall on his nose,   
and eyelashes.  
  
She always crouched in a corner, pulled her jacket up over her ears.  
There was always a peaceful look in her eyes.No matter how much he hated  
the gray smoke that came out of her nose, the musky feeling it left  
behind on her skin, he could stand and watch her smoke for a long time.  
  
Luka kept walking, without his hat, snow littering his hair with  
white, walking with no scarf, goosebumps on the back of his neck.  
The cold didn't seem to faze him as Luka kept walking, down the  
ambulance bay, towards the basketball court on the side of the hospital.  
  
Sports had meant fooseball. He couldn't look at a fooseball table, couldn't  
stand to enter a bar, watch a new flirty couple with the haze of love in  
their eyes playing pool, arms around each other, someone's lips searching  
the others while they played.  
  
  
Me  
I'm the one you chose   
Out of all the people   
You wanted me the most  
I'm so sorry that I'm falling  
Help me up lets keep on running  
Don't let me fall out of love  
  
  
  
  
  
The basketball bounced off the ice, making small cracking noises.The bouncing  
stopped, like someone was hugging the piece of sports equipment. Each step  
forward, and the smell of cigarettes was stronger in Luka's nose.  
  
"So you've taken to lurking in the shadows" Abby chuckled, tossing Luka  
the basketball. He watched it roll past his ankles and chased after it,  
blushing."What's up, Luka?"  
  
He shrugged, dribbling the ball carefully, forehead wrinkled in concentration.  
  
  
"You usually follow me?"  
  
Luka chuckled, laughing harder as the basketball fell against the basket  
and bounced right back at him."No, I was just...thinking".  
  
Abby threw down her cigarette, stamped it into the ice below them. She   
smiled at the hiss."Me, too".  
  
  
Running, running  
As fast as we can  
I really hope you make it  
(Do you think we'll make it?)   
We're running  
Keep holding my hand  
It's so we don't get separated  
  
  
  
  
  
She wasn't conviently beautiful, but she was brave. Just the fact that she  
had asked him out, that she had kissed him, made losing her even harder.  
She was the piece of him that had disappeared. She was a piece of him he  
had just started to miss, to realize that he needed it to function.  
  
Brown eyes turned to look at him."That thing on your cheek is healing".  
  
Luka jumped, startled by the words that interrupted his silence."Oh? Yeah..  
yeah, my cheek". Her finger traced the shiny pink scar, and smiled at him.  
"Susan did a good job stitching it up".  
  
Her finger stopped under his eye."You look tired".  
  
"I was going to say the same thing about you" he chuckled softly."You look  
like you haven't slept".  
  
"I- I haven't", Abby answered, digging around in her pocket for another  
cigarette."Been working for a few straight days so I don't have to go home".  
  
She bit her tongue after she saw how Luka paled."No" Abby answered,"No,  
it's not like that. It's just..."  
  
Luka looked down at their footprints that were melting into the ice as the  
sun slowly came up.   
  
Abby cupped her hand around her cigarette, and threw her lighter into her  
pocket, taking a deep breath."It's just not working right now."  
  
He nodded, stuffing his hands back in his pockets."I- I understand how  
that is."  
  
  
Be  
Be the one I need  
Be the one I trust most  
Don't stop inspiring me  
  
  
  
  
  
  
She wanted to say,we're going to work on it.But Abby didn't, looking back  
at the burning end of her cigarette."It's weird that we're so different.  
Me and him. I didn't think about it before. But I went to this function thing,  
and god, Luka.."  
  
Luka looked up, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"I felt out of place. He gave them 10 million dollars without blinking."  
Abby studied the burning embers of her cigarette, and threw it on the  
ice."And he didn't do a single thing to make me feel any better, Luka.That  
was the kicker. He didn't do a thing to make me comfortable".  
  
He closed his eyes, and saw his hands around the neck of that man that scared  
Luka. That mugger scared him more than he let on, and while they stood  
in the hospital, watching him code, Abby's hand on his back,he just closed  
up. He went inside himself.  
  
"I never was good at that" Luka answered softly.  
  
Abby slipped her hand out of her pocket, and slipped it into his pocket,  
linking her fingers around his."You were.I mean, you are", she replied, resting  
her head on his woolen shoulder."I don't know". Abby closed her eyes,  
burying her face in his shoulder.  
  
"I just wanted to make sure you were happy."   
  
  
  
Sometimes it's hard to keep on running  
We work so much to keep it going  
Don't make me want to give up 


End file.
